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Dear Cormac,

Yesterday was your due date. I marked the 22nd of January on the calendar the minute I got off the phone with my OB’s office. We were so excited for you.  You were already a part of our family. We were devastated to learn you would only remain with us in our hearts instead of our arms.

The last 9 months have been hard, sweet boy. We have missed you and ached for you. Losing you was magnified when I miscarried again five months after you. We named that sweet one Asher Grace, due July 1st. I know you and Asher are keeping good company together with Jesus, but the grief is still sharp.

As we drew closer to your due date, Cormac, I knew I wanted us to honor and celebrate your life in some way, celebrate your birth and your place in our family.

So we sent you some birthday balloons.

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Daddy, N, and I each wrote on a balloon that we loved you. The last balloon was your balloon, and we wrote your name and due date on it.

N drew you a picture on her balloon. =) I hope you like it.

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N sent your her balloon first. After she gave it a kiss and released it, she ran around in circles yelling, “Happy Birfday, Co-mik! Happy Birfday, bruhver Co-mik!”.

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Then Daddy gave his balloon to you a kiss and sent it your way. Your daddy loves you fiercely, Cormac. I hope you see that.

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Then it was Mommy’s turn. I gave my balloon a big hug and kiss before I sent it to you.

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Then we sent you your balloon all together.

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I hope you enjoyed the balloons, Cormac. We loved being able to celebrate you and remember you. Like we wrote on your balloon, you are always remembered, always loved. You will forever be a part of our family. Thank you for changing Mommy and Daddy for the better. We love you, Cormac Ryan. Happy Birthday.

Love, Mommy, Daddy, and N.

*special thanks to my mother-in-love for taking these wonderful pictures for us*

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